This entry is in honor of my friend Bobby, who asked me to paint this painting for him, based on a poem he wrote: “Kaleidoscope Mind.” I was honored that he trusted me to make his thoughts and words visible. Unfortunately, Bobby passed away not long after I finished his painting. Rest in peace, Bobby.

“Kaleidoscope Mind” 2016
Acrylic on 16″ x 20″ Canvas

This is what Bobby said when he asked me to make this painting:

“I put my thoughts on paper, but never on canvas. I hope you can paint my thoughts. I wish I had your talent. As for my depression, it is mostly under control. Had a huge setback when I lost Joan. Some of my writings are being used at a hospital in St. Louis, so I feel like I’m helping someone.”

This is his poem:

“Kaleidoscope Mind”

by Robert Ritchey

Thoughts racing through an endless sea of disbelief. 
Unable to stop the blurred images chasing through your mind 
on a collision course with uncertainty. 
Heart pounding like a thousand drums 
beating to a song of desperation. 
Clutching at straws, 
unable to grasp at what seems like a last chance of sanity. 
The ticking of a clock, 
one second closer to the feeling of despair. 
Time flying by, 
like the pages of a calendar 
in a whirlwind of emotions. 
And as quickly as it began, 
reality is returned . . . 
The feeling of tranquility,
restored by the small white pill. 
The pill than changes the colors 
in your Kaleidoscope Mind."

This is what he said at the end of the poem:

“Note: This is my interpretation of an anxiety attack, and the medicine use to overcome it. The medicine only helps for a while. And you can’t quit taking it. I think the road to complete sanity is just a big never-ending circle.”